On the Fact that When I Was In Second Grade I Didn't Even Know My Teacher's First Name (Never Mind Her Boinking Partners) and, Believe it or Not, I Did OK (to the Point Where I Even Support Gay Marriage as an Adult)

Gotta' get back to basics, folks (reading, mathematics, civics, science, etc.), 'cause if we don't, we might as well just bend over to China now. Get it over with, right?