Wednesday, September 10, 2008

A Break From My "Right-Wing" Talking-Points

As a lover of old movies/stars and everything, folks, I just can't help but be perplexed by certain twists of historical fate. Why, for instance, aren't luminaries such as Charles Boyer and Deborah Kerr not as revered in retrospect as they should be? I mean , I know that certain factors such as charisma and celebrity (not to mention the fickleness of taste) have a tendency to play into things here but, really, folks, we're not exactly looking at a couple of potted-plants here, damn it. And, yes, the examples are numerous - almost ridiculously so, in fact.........................................Of course, there's always that one example the likes of which a person is more than happy to lobby for - yes, independent of the others. For me, that would clearly have to be the disarming, talented, and beautiful (subtly ferocious, in this regard) British actress, Jean Simmons.............................................For those of you who don't remember, Simmons was a routinely busy actress whose career (not to mention, style) coincided with those of Audrey Hepburn and Grace Kelly. She was one of the biggest/most bankable stars of that era (late 40s to early 60s) but, while the public continues to revere Hepburn and Kelly, it has all but forgotten Jean Simmons.............................................Well, let me tell you something. That's not going to be the case around here, folks - not as long as I have a breath to spare, anyway. I mean, look at the frigging resume, for Christ! At age 17, she was holding her own opposite John Mills and Alec Guinness ("Great Expectations", 1946). Two years later, she was trading riffs with Olivier in "Hamlet", holding her own with him as well. Yeah, that's right. She was going toe-to-toe with Olivier at age 19. Not exactly shabby, huh?...............................................And look at the other movies she was in; "Spartacus" (opposite Kirk Douglass), "The Robe" (opposite Richard Burton), "Elmer Gantry" (opposite Burt Lancaster), "The Big Country" (opposite Gregory Peck). She even did a movie with Brando and Sinatra, for Christ! Granted, "Guys and Dolls" was a tad of a dud and all but, really, folks, surviving a movie with Brando AND Sinatra, that alone is a hell of a testament. I don't know about you guys, but I'm thinking that maybe some sort of lifetime achievement award at a future Oscar ceremony might be in order. Hopefully, not TOO far into the future, though - she'll be 80 in January.


M.R. said...

Will didn't you show Elmer gantry at work a while ago Classic Cinema?

clif said...

Since St Sarah of Wasilla is now on the ticket, it’s time to brush up on the crazy end of time prophecies again …

Armageddon quiz

Question #1

1. Finish this thought.

Armageddon will occur…

a) In 2012, coinciding with the end of the Mayan calendar.

b) When the “fat lady” sings in your church and not the one where the hateful dirty hippies go down the street …..

c) Whether you like it or not, so remember to invest in Jebus.

d) Due to unprecedented levels of stupidity in Washington, especially the ones fueled by the Jebustaini crowd.

2. When Armageddon occurs, what is truly important?

a) You loved Jebus and did really really want all those evil people bombed back to the stone age which never existed on the 6000 year old earth anyway …

b) To cash in your 401k and bring your bank book to the rapture …. yes they use windows and their computers crash all the time also.

c) Get your hair done, Jebus does look at things like that.

d) Dress comfortably, eternity really is a long time.

3. When thinking of Armageddon, where should you look for signs…

a) The televangilist with the best looking hair to predict it right this time.

b) Look up “” on the tubes, they keep track of these things so you don’t have to

c) An increase in global disasters, even the clueless stupid human trick created ones.

d) An increase in homeowner insurance premiums, which will have to be paid to St Peter before admittance.

4. In Armageddon, according to Jesus’ sermon on the mount preaching, who will inherit
the earth?

a) The trial lawyers, but after all who wants the smoking radioctive ruin. All the really hip people are on the Jebustani bus anyway …..

b) Bill Gates III, if they ever get windows working properly ….hey even Jebus can’t get to to work right

c) John McCain’s last unwanted lobbyist love child.

d) The “meek” (minus the usual 15% in lawyers fees).

5. What is meant by “the rapture?”

a) It’s something that can happen when you pick up a really heavy object.

b) A Toronto basketball player, no really all those preachers were getting their signals crossed with the ESPN feed ….

c) It’s like when God will rescue His faithful before the battle of Armageddon …. look up it on “”

d) It’s when the clueless right wingers actually get one real fact correct, and the rest of us will be finally relieved, remember;
“Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?”

6. It is said that when Jebus returns,

He will rebuild his temple in…

a) New Jersey, right on top of Jimmy Hoffa’s real grave site.

b) Lower Alabama, which they abbreviate LA, who knew Jebus was that clueless.

c) Disney World …. hey he got the LA part right didn’t he?

d) The New Jerusalem, but don’t tell AIPAC ….

7. Which of the following 2 characters did NOT help Dorothy find her way to the Emerald City?

a) The Scarecrow

b) The Rove

c) The Tin Man

d) The Rumsfeld

e) The Cowardly Lion

8. In the 11th century, the Irish Bishop Malachy made a series of
predictions, meticulously listing and describing each of the remaining 112 Popes leading up to the final battle of Armageddon. According to Malachi’s predictions, only one Pope remains after our present Pope, Benedict.

Pick the correct one

a) Pope Cheney, of the Dick

b) Peter, the Roman.

c) St Johnny of the Hanoi … hey he’s NOT Pope yet

d) Pope Dubya of the clueless

9. Which of the following is NOT an Edgar Cayce prophecy?

a) Atlantis will rise from the depths of the Atlantic Ocean.

b) In North America, a cataclysmic change will cause the Great Lakes
to drain into the Gulf of Mexico.

c) Both California and Japan will sink into the Pacific Ocean.

d) Pizza will be delivered within 30 minutes - or it’s free.

And finally…

10. What have the prophets really been trying to warn mankind of for centuries?

a) Of the many changes to the earth we face, especially the man made ones.

b) That the mark of “the Beast” is just a bad haircut, why do you think all those televangelists work SO hard trying to have such immaculate hair all the time?

c) That the words prophet and profit are surprisingly similar, the only difference is where you “invest” your soul.

d) That like P.T. Barnum said, there’s a sucker born every minute, and the televangelists have a better business model anyway.

Bonus question;

If you vote “properly” do you;

a. Get a couple bonus points in Jebustani world, unless the compound interest levels drop below the preordained levels of return, then you must make an additional donation on Sunday also.

b. Get a extra free pass on a couple venial sins, and double bonus sins from those wild liquid fueled Saturday nights.

c. Free two lost souls from the 11th ring of hell …. the one right next to Gitmo.

d. Get a front row seat to Armageddon and your pick of buses on trip to Jebustani during the rapture

Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

She's not my candidate, Clif. Not voting for her, never would. Well, unless she was running against Alan Keyes. And like I said before, I think it's all bullshit.

Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

Yes, Mair, I played it a couple of months ago, on a Sunday. Remember, I kept doing my Burt Lancaster laugh?

clif said...

She's not my candidate, Clif. Not voting for her, never would. Well, unless she was running against Alan Keyes. And like I said before, I think it's all bullshit.

Where's your sense of humor Will?

That was meant to be FUNNY son.

Reread it with out your preconceptions of any hidden intent.

Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

It was funny. I thought that maybe you were expecting me to defend her. I mean, I don't hate. I could probably come up with a few good things to say about her, even. She's just way too conservative on the social issues for me to support her. And as she falls in line with McCain on his foreign policy, that tends to make it even tougher.

clif said...

I thought that maybe you were expecting me to defend her.

Sounds like your kinda touchy about this one ....

I don't expect anything but the facts,


of course

right wing spin from Franny, Duncetron and crusty the clown.

Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

I get touchy when people put me in a box. Can't breathe.

clif said...

I never put you in the box here son;

YOU DID by your preconceptions of any hidden intent.

Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

Maybe not here but there have been other instances; I'm a closet right-winger, etc..

Anonymous said...

Did somebody hurt widdle will's feelings?

Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

Clif? Sybil?

Anonymous said...





Slade Leeds?






Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

Bradley Hadley?

Anonymous said...

Will in drag?

Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

Person with a lot of homophobia/time on their hands?

Anonymous said...

Is that true will?

Do you have a lot of homophobia/time on their hands?

Will "take no prisoners" Hart said...

I think we're talking about the person who started this rather inane and unproductive conversation. Funny, isn't it, how a lunatic can even lose track of a sequencing as basic as this?

Anonymous said...

Funny, isn't it, how a lunatic can even lose track of a sequencing as basic as this?

Don't know will, you seem to lose track of many of things and ask an incredibly large amount of stupid questions.